Monday, May 14, 2012

Righteous Ronnie Road Rage

To the young man riding a motorcycle on the Steese Highway the day before Mother's Day: Wear a helmet!!!!!! To the two other people riding motorcycles the day before Mother's Day, good job, your parents would be very proud of you for wearing a helmet.

 To the people who keep on forgetting to use their blinkers. Don't even get me started. Before operating your motor vehicle, check your mirrors and seat to see if they are in an appropriate position. Acquaint yourself with the position of your vehicle's wiper and turn signal controls. If you drive an air-colored car, consider turning your headlights into the "on" position. And then for the love of all that is holy put your cell phone away and use your blinkers! Gah! The rule is 100 yards before the turn. Not two seconds before you turn you inconsiderate, self-absorbed person who thinks the roadways exist for them and by them. You are not the center of the universe!

To the people who I see texting in their cars and not watching the roads. Please stop.

To the people who must talk on your cell phone in the car, I'm not saying I've never done it. And it's still legal in our great state. But most of the time (according to my extensive body of unbiased evidence) when I observe you doing stupid things, driving recklessly, or being generally inconsiderate you are discussing trivial matters on your cell phone. So if you must talk on the phone, make sure you're not being a terrible driver while you are doing it.

 Trivial matters include (in no particular order): Cheese. Television shows. The weather. Anything that isn't "Oh dear God, both of my legs have fallen off and I am bleeding to death and can you meet me at the emergency room!" And really in that case you should call 911 and pull your car over as you can no longer drive with bleeding leg sockets. Ok, here's a good reason to use it while you are driving, you are being followed and you are calling the troopers or a well-armed loved one to help you.

Finally, if you are driving a car at one time our government thought you were talented enough to pull that off. Think about that for a second. What I am getting at is, it doesn't mean you are!!!!

With no love lost for bad drivers who just don't care - Righteous Ronnie

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